Monday, 5 April 2010

Question of the month....Cyndi L

Was just checking through blogs I follow,( feeling abit low despite having accomplished quite alot creatively this weekend ).......and Cyndi L asked as her Question of the Month......

" What would be your dream vacation this summer?"

Cyndi would like to go back to Italy if money were not an option and she had the time and opportunity she says.

Well here am I sat thinking how nice it would have been to have had a bunch of flowers, or an easter egg off either of my two offspring, both of whom I have considerably helped out financially recently, yet niether of them made time to pop over with a hug, kiss or token Easter gift, not even a Happy Easter text lol .
Yet am sure they will have given 'somethings' to their partners and probably to the partners Mum, son or sister!
So feeling sorry for myself, probably also overwhelmed by the ongoing threat of  litigation with the Insurance folk over the after flood fiasco theyve put me through, in an effort to have my insurance premiums brought back to where they should be....I read Cyndi's question and.... thankfully its made me remember..........
this was my answer to her question in her comments section ..

I flew once upon a time, with the RAF as a loadmaster and went round the world to some simply amazing, off the tourist path places.

( Midway Island for instance where primary coloured budgies flew around like sparrows do here in the Uk..and Gooney birds landed in a cartoon like, base-over-apex manner! So funny to watch, but in the sky they fly elegantly and effortlessly) ......BUT

..... if I had the choice, Id want to go back to see Kathmandu - because at every turn there was something stunning and of interest to photograph, and high above Nepal were these statuesquely magnificent diamond hewed mountains, that reflected the suns rays and were all manner of colours at all times of the day.

The streets were visually fascinating, the people were so friendly yet they had so little compared to what we surround ourselves with. The tiny shops were a feast of inspiration and there was the enigmatic 'Kumari Princess', hidden away behind fretwork shutters, only able to peer out at the city that reveers her status, yet denies her the freedom of a woman. Hers was a truly Royal and feted position but ultimately a lonely one.

I had a point and shoot camera in those days and had pictures developed in Hong Kong, where I was stationed for afew weeks at a time, flying back and forth between Nepal and HKG.

Whatever developer they used has begun to fade away and its now symbolic to me that, that part of my youth and life, is also passing out of memory.

In those days I wasnt interested in textiles, so to go back now would be sheer joy!

Ive had a great life in so many ways, though interspersed with turmoil and sadness like everyones.
It comes hard to realise youve become little more than an extremity of your own childrens lives, though you have succeeded in helping them to be independant and thats how it goes isnt it, how its supposed to be I guess.
Its part of the dreadful, inescapeable, 'invisability' as we age, this no longer needed feeling and the photographs I took in Nepal which are fading and yellowing, in line somehow, with my own fading and ageing you know?
So I remembered my wonderful trips to Nepal, when I was little more than my daughters age now, though I sent postcards back to my Mum and Dad all the time from where ever I went in the world, there were many Easters I never managed to take Mum flowers.
Now its too late to do so again, it inevitably hurts.
The circle of life goes on.... and one day, in turn, my offspring will feel this way maybe, thats sad isnt it.

On that, I apologise for this maudlin post and will go get a cupper and get stuck into some black gesso, which Id forgotten Id got but found, and have now daubed all over!

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